Mike's Views

... non-violent, revolutionary, anarchist

STUCK IN HEALTH FOOD HELL

I felt an overwhelming sense of deja vu.

I was standing at the food samples counter at Trader Joe's, eating soy chorizo, lentil and corn chili from a small dixie cup. It was tasty, really good. A skinny, middle aged guy with gray hair was eating next to me. He said, it's almost vegan, except for the sour cream. I said, health food meets tex mex. He said, you know the bible says you shouldn't eat meat. It's right there in Genesis.

I said, but it also says we have dominion over the beasts of the field. He lifted his nose and sniffed. He said, dominion doesn't mean we should eat them. I said, aren't we originally omnivorous scavengers? Didn't early humans eat eggs and shellfish? He said, we don't look like bears or racoons. He said, the pH in our stomach isn't the same as omnivores.

I said, you know, I heard a story about Kathmandu, Nepal. He looked up. I said, I heard that they run pigs through the streets as a sewer system, but they don't eat pork because they're Buddhist vegetarians. He said, Nepal is very corrupt, they aren't real Buddhists. I said, they sell the pork to the tourists. He said, the Dalai Lama is a fraud and a charlatan. He eats meat.

I said, have a nice day. I walked up the aisle. I couldn't take it any more. Later I saw him walking out the front door, he had an apple and a banana in one hand, and a bag of something in the other.

It reminded me of something that happened almost 50 years ago. I was in a hippy commune in the Sangre de Cristo mountains outside of Taos. A woman said, these aluminum cooking pots are giving me sores in my mouth. I pointed out that the pots were stainless steel, not aluminum.

Another time I was invited to a lecture. An optometrist was selling colon cleansing products, to get rid of the toxins in your system. He said, you could end up with diverticulitis or diverticulosis. Just think about all the toxins in your colon. I left early.

I remember when my oldest son was enrolled in a Waldorf pre-school. The teacher wore orange robes, her guru had told her that was the color of her aura. She didn't allow the children to bring lunchboxes with tv cartoon characters. I spent half a day looking, and finally found a lunchbox that just said Thermos. She didn't allow any toy guns. They played with wooden swords instead. When boys have toy guns, they point them and say, bang bang. It turns out when they have wooden swords, they hit each other over the head with them.

I am paralyzed with despair. I smell patchouli oil.

Should I seek help?